Tuesday, July 29, 2008


Today marks 34 weeks. Only 6 weeks to go (or less, if you believe yesterday's ultrasound measurements). I'm really starting to think that I'm going to go into labor a bit before my due date, like a week or so. Or maybe this is just wishful thinking, since I'm reaching the "uncomfortable" phase of late pregnancy. This is also my 100th post, in ~10 months. From initial infertility workup to 34 weeks of pregnancy in 100 easy installments.

Thanks for the pack n play suggestions. I'm torn about it, because I wasn't planning to own a pack n play. Their main purpose, from what I could tell, was for baby to sleep in while at Grandma's house. Since my parents and S's parents live in different states, they each bought their own pack n play to keep there, so we wouldn't have to lug one with us whenever we fly to visit. So, I didn't think that we needed to buy one for ourselves. Several friends heard this and told me I was nuts, insisting that I would use it around the house and to bring other places. I'm still not convinced, but the pack n plays with built-in bassinets are cheaper than standalone bassinets, and more compact for storage, so I guess that's probably what we'll do. I'm still viscerally upset that the most obvious big thing for any nursery, the crib, is the one thing that won't be there when Barack is born, but I know that I'm just having an emotional reaction to it, and it actually won't matter; the pack n play will be fine. Right?

Part of why I'm upset is that I spent a fair amount of time researching safe sleeping quarters for newborns. Firm mattress, high-quality snug-fitting sheets, that sort of thing. So, now we have a great safe mattress and several recommended sheets (the one place where I feel like I splurged a bit, to get all cotton, all-around elastic, higher-than-normal thread count, etc.) but I'm not going to be using them for several months. Instead, for the first 2 months (or more!) I'm supposed to be okay with having the baby sleep on a flimsy piece of foam that comes with the pack n play. And the sheets I've seen that fit the pack n play "mattress" are loose-fitting cotton-polyester blends that are rough and practically see-through. Is that really the safest sleeping quarters for a newborn? Even the pack n play manufacturers warn that they're not meant to be permanent sleeping quarters for babies. And if it really IS safe... it means that I wasted a whole lot of energy making the crib safe, because apparently it doesn't matter. Either way, I get upset. Blech.

On to happier topics. My cousin J (the only relative who lives within a 500+ mile radius of me) threw me a baby shower on Saturday. I had waffled for months about whether to even have a shower (in traditional Judaism, you don't have baby showers) and finally decided to go ahead with it only a few weeks ago. In the week leading up to the shower, I was starting to have doubts again. Part of it was a tempting-fate hesitancy, and part was because it seemed a little sad to be having a shower without any family there other than J. But, most of my local friends came, J did a gorgeous job decorating, had a ton of great food (including several desserts made by a friend with pastry chef training), and the weather was fantastic, so we got to hold the entire thing outside in J's park-like back yard.

The best part was the surprise that J had for me at the beginning of the shower. Several friends had arrived, and we were sitting and talking, when I saw one of my friends look at something behind me and scream. I turned around to find my mom walking towards me. She and J had secretly arranged for her to fly here for the weekend (more than 2,000 miles).

Something to know about my family: we love pulling big surprises on each other. My brother and I, on numerous occasions, have planned surprise parties for my parents. Since we all live in different states, these involve secretly making long-distance travel plans and then showing up at my parents' house when they haven't seen us for months. I also helped my sister-in-law surprise my brother several years ago with a birthday trip to Las Vegas -- he found out about the trip 2 hours before their flight, and only found out that S and I were in on it when I jumped on his back in the lobby of the MGM Grand while they were checking in. Fun stuff.

But no one in the family had ever pulled a surprise on me, until now. And I really didn't see it coming. A few weeks ago, my mom had casually asked whether I wanted her to come to town for my shower, and I told her that was silly. It was just a small party, I'd see her a few weeks later once the baby was born, and she should save her money for that trip. But, she decided that she really didn't want to miss it, and thought it would be fun to have some mother-daughter bonding time before Barack makes his arrival and she'd have to "share" me with my dad, my in-laws, etc.

So, I had a wonderful weekend with my mom. We hung out at home after the shower, so I could show her everything we've done for the baby so far. On Sunday we went shopping, buying tons of baby clothes as well as a bathrobe for me to wear at the hospital. Her flight home Monday morning was soon after our doctor's appointment, so she came with us and was just going to wait in the waiting room until we were done. But when we found out that we were going to have an ultrasound, S went and got her and brought her to the room so that she could see it, too. She's never seen a fetal ultrasound before (didn't have them when she was pregnant with me and my brother, and lives too far away from my brother and sister-in-law to ever be included in any of theirs) and she was just blown away. It was fantastic.

Of course, once my dad found out that she got to see the ultrasound, he started regretting not having come on the trip with my mom, and we're all a little worried that my mother-in-law will be jealous when she finds out, since we don't think that she even knew I was having a shower. But we'll leave the potential family drama alone. For now, all is happy.


  1. i am sirry about your crib dilema.

    this is assvice - i had so much research on soo many topics about so many different things before baby was here - most has resulting in doing whatever it takes to get yours and baby's sleep/fed and content and alot of research/suggestions/theories are just that. I was extremely frustrated for some time about "the books.website/experts" say yhis is best/worst etc...

    It's learning on a curve - do what ever is best for you ahd what you want done.

    What an excellent shower suprise! That had to be so exciting!

  2. That is so wonderful that your mom surprised you for your shower. And that she got to see an u/s to boot! Very sweet.

  3. How wonderful about your Mom surprising you, and getting to be there for the ultrasound!


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